Uplifting and comical…a look at my life, motherhood and the circus that goes with it

mom funny

1. When your 4- year- old is asked what their favorite part about playing in a T- ball game is and they say “Drinking”.

2. When the only way to talk to another human being is by yelling.

3. When someone honks their horn and someone who is 2 feet tall in the back seat yells “you stupid idiot”.

4. When you stopped going to church as an adult and your child thinks they get to heaven by a rocket ship.

5. When your career path hasn’t been clearly defined; therefore resulting in your daughter going to gymnastics in a leotard and high heels. (only)

6. When your children come home from school and find you wearing jeans and ask you “where did you go today, you are all dressed up.”

7. When you find 18 candy wrappers underneath your child’s bed and feel disgusted, only to get in the car and find a million crumbs on the driver’s seat from your granola bar the other day. (not to mention the 18 half drunken water bottles)

8. Because shaving is not a priority that your children want to shave at the age of six not to look like a hairy beast as their mother.

9. When they find pieces of hair extensions around the house and don’t get concerned.

10. When they see you constantly touching your stomach because of being old and bloated all of the time, that you catch them doing it at 40 pounds putting the dishes away on a Tuesday morning.

11. When your eyeglasses are only considered “bedtime glasses” which sets alarms off for a preschooler when you wear them in the middle of the day.

12. When they purposely give themselves wedgies to resemble their mom’s underwear.

13. When you put laundry away and plastic tags from the store are located on both yours and your children’s clothing.

14. When someone asks if your daughter’s softball helmet is new and you say “No, its’ the same except this year we took the orange price tag off.” (apparently it’s the new mix and match way to save money)

15. When they tell you a million times that they love you, because you have done it to them since birth. (of course until they get to age 10 and they tell you they want to move out, but then again, so do you at times)

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